Blogging about teaching, parenting and whatever. Follow me on twitter @louhayne1
Sunday, 14 February 2021
Making numbers meaningful in geography
Friday, 5 February 2021
Don't smash the tablets!
When the timer goes off in our house and I yell up the stairs 'time to come off now' for the sixth time, I think about Kirstie Allsopp smashing up her kids tablets in a rage. 'I just need to....I've nearly finished...I am in the middle of a game' my kids bellow back at me. Argh! Every day the same conflict, every day I repeat the same mantra 'They design these things to keep you on...there is no end to them....you have to stop at some point...etc' I am sure that during lockdowns, you, like me have wrestled with the unhelpful parental guilt - they've been on their tablets for over an hour, they should be climbing trees and making dens like famous five children. When will we stop with the unrealistic expectations? We are not in the 1950's, we are living in exceptional times, we should give ourselves a break. Having a long hard talk to myself here.
Recently I wrote a teacher training module on internet harms and online relationships for the new curriculum in secondary schools and so I have conducted a fair bit of research on this subject. I can't say that it makes me an expert but there are some things that I can share:
- Embrace their world. It might not be your thing but if they want to play Fortnite because all their friends are then you could try it out first. My sister and I had a proper mum battle once. Her teenage kids, rolling their eyes profusely, secretly enjoyed watching us master the controls. We only just managed to work out how to look up and by that time we'd been shot but it did give us an idea about the excitement of the game.
- It isn't as harmful as you think. We have, in our house been sticking vehemently to a one hour a day limit but we're going to extend it after a period of intense Brexit-style negotiations. I have searched for evidence to show the students how bad it was to be online and found that recent research shows that being online for children had more positive effects than negative. Keep an eye out for new research because large studies are ongoing about the effects on mental health, I find this magazine is great for updates about online activity and research.
- It is social. In covid times it's a lifeline but even in normal times it brings great social development skills. I listened in occasionally on my kid's Fortnite playing expecting to hear rage but one of the boys was singing a lovely little nonsense song. My children and their dad bond over games of Fortnite with and against each other, headphones on, one upstairs and one downstairs. What follows is great collaboration skills and tremendous excited shouts as one of them has sniped the other.
- In the words of a youtuber 'allow it bro'. You know your kids the best and so know when they are ready for further connection with the online world. On speaking to students at school about what they are and aren't allowed, I find that those who are heavily restricted find ways around it. One girl would upload the apps for the school day and delete them before she got home. This secrecy puts her in a vulnerable place because she didn't have a trusted adult to discuss her online issues with. If you allow anything below the recommended age, check it out on one of the websites below and have a good chat about what might go wrong and set the privacy settings with them.
- Be their trusted adult: We all live in fear of the online predator, the newspaper seem to revel in the high numbers of online child sexual abuse. On a training course at school we were taught that children who did not confide in a trusted adult were extremely vulnerable. Predators test children with secrets, asking victims not to tell a harmless secret and if they don't confide, then they are at risk from abuse. Tell your child that they may make mistakes online and that if they do, you want to hear about it and that you won't judge them for it.
- Talk about gaming rage. Not all games give them rage I notice, I am a fan of Among Us and Minecraft because they don't need wrenching away from them so much. When the shouty rage is upon them once you've switched off the broadband, let them go for it and then take them out for a walk (my favourite sanction) for as long as it takes them to get over it.
- Find balance with screen time: I don't know how much time they should have online. The research isn't out yet but I like this article from safer internet which highlights the importance of finding balance. This is something that I am trying to explain on our walks.
- Point out your own failings. Let's face it we are all a bit addicted to our phones so we can't be too hypocritical when trying to peel the kids away from their screens - the enticing notifications, the click bait articles and social media are so difficult to ignore. App developers are smart at designing that tunes into our sense of anxiety and esteem. Nicola Morgan writes about the neuroscience in this in her book for teenagers. My youngest likes to help me with my phone addiction and enjoys pointing out when I am glued. If you are going to have a screen free day for them, you ought to suck it up too although I wish the goddamn thing has so much important stuff on it. When did it happen that we couldn't function without them - curse you Silicon Valley!
So finally I suppose we have to take ourselves back to our childhoods and the Commodore 64, or 16 if you, like me, had the cheaper version. We did love playing Daily Thompson's Olympics or watching friends play it (I guess this was our equivalent of the Youtube dross) so who are we to deny our kids this. Obviously caution this with a balance of other activities (when I do drag the children back to the 1950's they do love a tree climb). Most importantly enjoy that game time, the silence is bliss!
References and useful sites.
https://www.thinkuknow.co.uk/parents/ - CEOP for safety concerns
https://www.familylives.org.uk/advice/ Family Lives
https://www.saferinternet.org.uk/advice-centre/parents-and-carers - Safer Internet Centre
Also see my blog on sex for information about online pornography.
Why won't they LISTEN?
As it is the Christmas holidays and the kids, high on sugar and excitement I figured a blog about getting kids to listen might be useful. I...
-
My first geography blog and I have decided to focus on my weakness - numbers. I am going to blame my dad who professes he is no good with n...
-
I assumed that home learning would be easy, I have over 20 years teaching experience and I thought I would bring out my classroom managemen...